A Christmas Tale 2008, Cheesy Sitcom Style...
Category FamilyReceived Friday from my brother Steve - six years my junior, an attorney in Dallas (who just made partner in his firm...I'm so damn proud!)...
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(based on a true story)
(Fade In. Steve enters scene with Ipod, rocking out and lip syncing to Mariah Carey’s version of “All I Want For Christmas is You.” Kristina, getting ready for her day, overlooks Steve’s glaring dorkiness and continues to watch Good Morning America with the volume on the TV set at about eleventy billion, so she can “still hear it while I am blow-drying my hair”….)
Steve: “Hey Love.”
Kristina: “Hey.”
Steve (observing that the wheels are turning): “What’s Up?”
Kristina: “I think I’m ready to get married.”
Steve: “Sure you are.” (smiles, leans over and kisses Kristina gently on the top of her head)
Kristina: “No, really. I’m ready.”
Steve: “You’re not ready.”
Kristina: “I am ready! You are not the boss of me!”
Steve: “Hmmm. OK, so, uh, when?”
Kristina: “I don’t know. But I’m ready.”
Steve: “So you’re saying you’re ready?”
Kristina: “I’m READY!!!”
Steve: “Alright. Me too.”
Kristina: “Really? You are? Oh my gosh. What if I’m not ready!?”
Steve: (silent, in a dumbfounded kind of way)
Kristina: “Hehe. Just kidding. I’m ready.”
Steve: “OK, when do you want to get married?”
Kristina: “Soon. I’m ready.”
Steve: “Excellent. And we’re eloping, like we talked about before, right?”
Kristina: “Well……sort of….except that can we invite…… (ALL OF THE RECIPIENTS OF THIS E-MAIL)”
Steve: “That’s 48 people.”
Kristina: “Yes. So? What’s the problem? We want all of our closest friends and family there, right?”
Steve: “Of course. No problem at all…and sure, that would be absolutely wonderful if all those people could make it, but technically eloping is when you …”
Kristina “WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO RUIN MY WEDDING!”
Steve: “Um... Lets get back to the date. What do you think?”
Kristina: “Well, we need to pick carefully. Lots of my friends are pregnant and might not be able to travel at certain times.”
(Yeah, you know who you are. You can’t hide it….or at least eventually you won’t be able to. Can’t believe you didn’t take into account the possibility that we would be possibly maybe potentially planning a wedding which may or may not have been a wedding with guests when you went and got all knocked up. Some. People.)
(Meanwhile, Steve skillfully and carefully manipulates the date-picking process to achieve his preferred date, using his considerable lawyering skills. Kristina uses her considerably greater lawyering skills and lets Steve believe that he is skillfully and carefully manipulating the date-picking process while skillfully and carefully manipulating Steve into believing that her preferred date is his preferred date. February 21, 2009 is chosen. Everybody wins.)
Steve: “So now we need a place. A place with romance. A place with beauty. A place that truly reflects the depth of our love for each other. (cue patriotic music) Someplace that symbolizes the greatest of traditions and American values. Someplace that….”
Kristina: “Vegas!”
Steve: “Exactly!”
Kristina: “So that’s it, then, right?”
Steve: “Yep. February 21. Vegas.”
Kristina. “Wait a minute.”
Steve: “What? Did we forget something?”
Kristina: “You haven’t asked me.”
Steve: “I haven’t asked you what?”
Kristina: “You haven’t asked me to marry you!”
Steve: “Oh.” “Will you marry me?"
Kristina: "No!"
Steve: "No!!?" "You just said you were ready!"
Kristina: "I don't mean "No". I mean 'No, you can't ask me like that.'"
Steve: "Like what?"
Kristina: "Like that! I want WORDS!"
Steve: "Words?"
Kristina: "Yes. Words. Lots of them. Meaningful words. The 'will you marry me' part only comes at the end."
Steve (the light bulb turns on): "Oooooooooh.....Woooooords." "Well, it just so happens that I have a little something prepared for this moment. (pulls out multiple gum wrappers with scribbling and assembles them in the same manner one would assemble, say, a small nuclear device). Alright, here goes:
"A couple years ago we met, exchanged a short ‘hello’ and spoke for all of about 15 seconds. My first full, coherent thought about you, after noticing your smile and your energy, was that I wished I could find someone like you. It took me less time to figure out I wanted to spend my life with someone just like you than it takes me to pick out what color socks to wear in the morning. I don’t know how that happens. I don’t care how that happens. I only care that it did happen. Over the next couple of weeks, and as we ran together for the first time, I was just grateful to have met you, because you had set me on the right path – meeting you showed me what I needed to feel about someone, and nothing less was going to do. At the end of that run, as you know, as I was walking back to my car, I knew that I loved you, that I was in love with you, and as I asked God for you to be taken care of, I also realized that you are the first person in my life that I truly cared about more than myself.
Since that time, I would guess that I have not spent 2 waking minutes without thinking about you in some way or another. Sometimes I worry for you, sometimes I am nervous for you, sometimes I am happy for you and very often I am proud of you, but mostly I am just thinking of you, and us, together. Whenever I think about any part of my future, you are there with me. I think about us having a home. I think about us traveling to places we have never been. I think about us slowing down and retiring some day. I think about being able to keep up with you someday and finishing a marathon together. I think about sleeping in together on quiet Saturday afternoons. I think about us as two unique individuals, each achieving and growing, but so intertwined together that we can experience our lives with the full warmth and perspective that the other can provide.
I’ve gained so many things by being with you for the last couple years, and I am so lucky to have had that time with you. I have been so happy. But I have also lost something along the way – I have lost the ability to envision a future without you. I am hoping that I never have to experience that. So......."
Kristina: "YES!"
(applause.....Fade out.)
And so it went. Sort of. In reality, this whole episode kinda played out over a pretty long time. Like years. But here we are, and if you have made it this far reading this, maybe you will also be able to make it to our wedding, which will be on Saturday, February 21, 2009, in Las Vegas, Nevada. We have reserved a block of rooms at the MGM Grand Hotel for Friday and Saturday nights. We realize this is late notice. It is, however, Vegas, and it will be fun. The wedding will be fairly informal, and will be followed by dinner and then whatever everyone wants to do on the Vegas strip. You are also invited to brunch on Sunday morning, if your flight out leaves late enough. There will be some follow-up e-mails with more details, but we do know one thing - absolutely, positively, no gifts. We'd just like to get together with our families and closest friends for a fun weekend.
Thanks so much for being there throughout the years for Kristina and me. We love you all and hope you can make it.
Steve
Comments
And two lawyers - being romantic ? Tsk tsk. They'll be debarred!
---* Bill
Posted by Bill At 06:09:49 PM On 12/28/2008 | - Website - |