Lotus Rock Star :: The Top Ten Rejected Session Titles for Lotusphere 2010

Category LS10
Amidst the flurry of happy, sad, objective, subjective, defensive and downright offensive posts in the little yellowish with purple stripes world this week, I thought I'd do a little research. Due to my massive trove of inside connections (pun intended) and veritable hall pass to all things IBM, I found this nugget leaked out of IBM's secret database. Based on the statistical track manager rating system, the 80% of sessions that were rejected for Lotusphere 2010 included some real doozies. The "bottom 10" ranked sessions are listed below. Some present a bit of a space-time issue, some are most definitely just submissions from inexperienced folks, and some - based on IP tracing - may have come from competitors. You be the judge.

10. "How to get a Session at Lotusphere 2010"
9. "The One You Didn't Accept the Last Five Years: It's Better This Time, Really..."
8. "Opening General Session: If It Isn't Already Taken(?)"
7. "AdminP, Obscure Notes.ini Variables and Other Dinner Topics: Lessons in Social Acceptance"
6. "The Super Awesome Code Handout: This'll Get 'em In The Room"
5. "Mediocre Practices In Domino Development: Stuff You Might Maybe Want To Do"
4. "Great Sake Mistakes: How I Got Wasted at Kimonos Last Year and Learned Something I Will Now Teach You"
3. "Writing Brilliant Session Titles: The Secret is Behind the Colon"
2. "Your Dining Tent or Mine?: Old School Romance at Lotusphere"

And the #1 rejected session title for Lotusphere 2010 (traced to northwest Washington state....):

1. "Best Practices: Developing a COM Interface to the Quickr-Sametime-Connections Integration Vehicle Using Eclipse, .NET, Dreamweaver, Dojo, and Oh What the Hell Just use SharePoint"

I hope you enjoyed this foray into the dark and painful world of session selection, and to those of you who wrote the above abstracts, I won't say "sorry" I'll just say "wow, that's bad."

See you in Orlando (well not all of you!) on January 17th, 2010.

Disclaimer: None of the above is true. Well except the last part about being in Orlando. And the part about the hall pass, but it does require an escort.

Comments

1 - I know this isn't true. Because you left out my submission that I'm sure was in the bottom 10. "Beer is for wimps" Emoticon

Edited comment slightly -- Rob

Posted by Nathan T. Freeman At 01:55:05 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

2 -

Great!

Posted by Joe Baxter At 05:04:35 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

3 - "Your Dining Tent or Mine?: Old School Romance at Lotusphere" sounds like a great topic. Is this your topic for 2010 or 2011?

As for the hall pass, I'm not sure what Mrs Novak would say about you being with an "escort"? Emoticon

Posted by Ethann Castell At 06:29:34 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

4 - Brilliant, and more accurate then you may think!

Posted by Paul Mooney At 06:38:17 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

5 - I still can't believe my "Free Water and Code" didn't make the cut Emoticon

Posted by Christopher Byrne At 10:46:11 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

6 - Damm... At least six of those presentations I would have liked to attend. Any chance you might reconsider or should I hope they resubmit for Lotus Idol?

Posted by Peter Presnell At 11:28:52 PM On 11/19/2009 | - Website - |

7 - @1 - Edited comment *slightly*? You changed the whole meaning. Emoticon

Should just delete it in that case.

Posted by Nathan T. Freeman At 12:20:30 AM On 11/20/2009 | - Website - |

8 - A few years ago they rejected my session "Securing Your Hotel Room Infrastructure Against Minibar Attacks." I know someone who could have benefitted from it. Emoticon

Posted by Mike McGarel At 01:48:54 AM On 11/20/2009 | - Website - |